Crouching Rabbit Hidden Onion

For Written Chinese this semester I'm required to write a short passage each week, and it supposed to be continuous. Almost everyone else in the class are doing diaries of their lives, which are mind-numbingly boring to read, and one can only guess that to live such a life would be even more pointless and depressing. But I could be wrong.

In any event, I thought it was a great oppourtunity for a story told in weekly installments.
The first chapter was called Crouching Rabbit Hidden Onion, because in Mandarin it sounds similar to Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. Whilst my Chinese no doubt has a lot of errors in it, I'll publish it for the public to ridicule, and I'll give a translation too. So without further ado..

<<卧兔藏葱>>

莎士比亚就是说:什么在名字？

其实，名子在生活里的有很多重要性.

兔子有很多兄弟姐妹。 连父母亲也不知道每个兔子的名字。 虽然，有一天下午一个小兔子在森林，正在吃草。 他突然看了一个葱。 出乎意料，这个葱会说。

葱说：你叫什么名字？

兔子就说：我？我。。我忘了

葱说：那我给你新的名字。 您叫。。。兔深

兔深说：兔深？很好名字。 你呢？你叫什么名字？

葱说：我是聪明葱。再见啦

突然葱就消失。兔深说“再见啦？他一定是从新加坡来的”

<>
Shakespeare said: "What's in a name?"

In fact, names have great importance in our lives.

Rabbits have lots of brothers and sisters. Even the parents don't know every child's name. Although, one afternoon a small rabbit was in the forrest eating grass. He suddenly saw an onion. Strangely enough, this onion could speak.

Onion: What's your name?
Rabbit: I...I...I've forgotten..
Onion: Then I'll give you a new name. Your name is... Rabbit Deep
Rabbit Deep: Rabbit Deep? Cool name. And you? What's your name?
Onion: My name is...Intelligent Onion. Bye bye lah!

Suddenly the onion just disappeared. Rabbit Deep said "Bye Bye lah? He's definitely from Singapore".
-The End

Well, it's not quite Pynchon or Kerouac. Yet. But believe me compared to those diaries, this is full-blown excitement.

In other news, my good friend Paul has started a new blog. He's an old timer of blogs, and a man of great wit, so I advise everyone to read it. He's not in Japan, but that just means he'll be sour and funny in Cairns.